Seriously: Here There Be Spoilers.
Last Sunday, I saw The Last Jedi.
And without getting into spoilers at all, I’ll say that I walked in with a couple of big questions and got answers to both of them:
1. A Really, Really *SATISFYING* Answer. (But it was given by the least reliable character in the movie so, maybe, it’s not the real answer. But if it is the answer, it’s a good one anyway.)
2. The answer of “you know what, it doesn’t matter. Stop worrying about it.”
Here are the two questions I had:
1. Dude, what’s the story with Rey’s parentage?
2. Dude, what’s the story with Supreme Leader Snoke?
The answer to the first one hit me just right. Of course Rey’s parents were nobodies. Just like Anakin’s parents. Not some great lineage of Jedi, just one person hitting the right combination of genes and nutrition that gave them a 20% boost in Midichlorian production. The Force flows through them better than it flows through other people and, next thing you know, you’ve got yourself a Jedi. Or a Sith, I guess. (And the best part is that since Kylo Ren came up with this on his own, it’s not necessarily so. I mean, it makes *SENSE* for that to be the answer… but there’s still wiggle room for Keira Knightley’s character from Phantom Menace to be Rey’s grandmamma.)
The answer to the second one kind of irritates me. While I appreciate that Snoke isn’t supposed to be anything more than an overcomeable emperor figure (and how easily overcome!), I would have kind of enjoyed to learn that he was actually… oh, I dunno. *SOMEBODY*. As it is, we got told “eh, don’t worry about it. Dude’s dead.”
With those two major questions behind us, I’m now still chewing over the movie. Now, one thing I’ve complained about with, say, the Marvel superhero flicks is that they’re like eating cotton candy. Pleasant enough in the moment, forgotten a moment later. This movie is *NOT* like that. There was a take I remember seeing from the aftermath of The Force Awakens that said something like: The Force Awakens got the spices just right… but it was eating tofu. The Last Jedi, for all its faults, was not tofu. They got the spices right and, on top of that, they threw some serious red meat in there.
The fun part, of course, is to complain about the stuff that didn’t work. The gravity in space (not only for bombs but for bomb detonators). The trip to the Casino planet that pretty much came out and told you to feel the Bern. The admiral that picked up the idiot ball and refused to have a serious conversation with Poe about the plan. The boob creatures that put all of the trepidations about the porgs into perspective. The guy who betrayed the plan that Finn and Rose didn’t know about. The altercation with Captain Phasma. The guy who saw a new planet and decided to taste it.
All of those left me scratching my head and wondering why they didn’t have someone come in and read the script and ask a handful of dumb questions like “why aren’t they talking about this? Seems like they could talk about this. They’re right there in the room together.”
There were even some small disappointments
For one, on the casino planet, I surprised myself by finding my heart yearning to have the codebreaker that they were looking for end up being Lando Calrissian. Heck, they could even have him betray them again! That would have been awesome! As it is, it was Benicio del Toro playing the role of… I don’t even know who he was. Was he a plant? Was he the actual guy that they were supposed to be looking for? Was The Force acting in a mysterious way by giving Finn and Rose exactly what they didn’t know they really needed deep down?
For another, I kinda wished that it was Admiral Ackbar who said “Darn the torpedos!” and did the kamikaze run. They could have had him mumble “it’s a trap” before he pushed the button. This would have had the added benefit of allowing Laura Dern to come back next movie and not talk to anybody in that one too.
But, at the end of the day, the complaints that I have about the movie pale in comparison to the belly full of red meat that the filmmakers also gave me.
Kylo Ren is an *INTERESTING* character. Cranky Luke is an *INTERESTING* character. The sexual tension between Kylo Ren and Rey is *INTERESTING* sexual tension. The scene where the children told each other about Luke Skywalker defeating Kylo Ren using action figures was an awesome scene despite being a commercial for Star Wars Action Figures. And the little slave kid using the Force to help him sweep up? Hey, maybe Rey’s parents aren’t anybody. It’d make sense. There are a lot of potential Jedi out there. Or Sith, I guess.
It’s a fun movie to complain about and while I can totally understand how someone might not have liked it (and, indeed, my eyes rolled out of my head about three times)… man. I can’t wait to see the sequel. They did some really interesting stuff and I’m looking forward to complaining about the next one already.
So… what did you think?